Monday, September 8, 2008

Pregnant sex. Eeeewwww!

My husband and I are going to be staying in a hotel this next weekend. We had originally planned to share it with another couple but those plans fell through so now it's just us. This of course leads my husband to say "so we can have hot sex." Now, I know he's kidding (mostly) because we don't have "hot sex." Plus, as I explained to him, at 30 weeks pregnant there's no such thing as "hot" sex, there's "pity sex," or "sympathy sex," or even "fine whatever just get it over with sex." If there's anyone out there having hot sex at 30 weeks pregnant that's just kind of gross. Now I know a lot of women get hornier later on in their pregnancies (that's because of the increased blood flow to the vaginal area - not because they all of a sudden feel hot and are extremely attracted to their spouse) but I still doubt they're having hot sex. It'd be more of a "shut up, don't talk, I just need a little relief" sex. And really, who would WANT to have hot sex with a pregnant woman in her 3rd trimester. Now, I don't want my husband to find me horribly repulsive because c'mon, it's his sperm that caused this whole fandango so he should at least think I look cute or have some sort of sacred Madonna like quality about me, but I would have to seriously question his sanity if he was looking at me and thinking "yeah, I just wanna hit that. Ooh baby." That's a little weird to me. I've heard there ARE some men who find pregnant women really attractive. I don't get it. I could see there being some sort of "that's right, I knocked her up. My boys can swim," manly pride thing going on. But finding me sexy right now? What's sexy? My huge stretch marks? My belly button sticking out? Oh, I know, it's my giant fat ass (stretch marks included on that as well). Or maybe the zits all over my face - so hot!

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